Recently, a reader asked me an interesting question, which I would like to address today. So here it is:
'God gave me talents. I want to be a wife and mother, but do you think I should only be a wife and mother and waste the precious gifts God blessed me with?'
Through blogging and otherwise, I met so many gifted, talented, special, intelligent and educated ladies that still choose to be full-time homemakers. No woman, family or home is ever the same. We don't live in a cookie-cutter world and each one of us has her own special talent or ability God generously blessed her with. Do I think we should we reject His blessings and throw these talents away? Of course not!
However, here's one important point to remember: since our talents (and everything we have) are God-given, it means we should use what we were given to glorify Him. Our abilities are our instruments which can be used wisely or foolishly, and if they don't bring glory to God, the gift is turned into a curse.
Another point: if God blesses us with a family, it means we are in charge of this family (both husband and wife in their unique and complementary roles). By serving our family, we serve God. No, I'm not saying we can only serve Him through our family; we can be for example active in our community, host a charity event, volunteer in a pregnancy crisis center, start a business and so on and so forth. Do I also include work in that list of other activities we might be doing? Yes. However, our primary concern should definitely be the well-being of our family – those precious people God entrusted us with. Can we juggle our primary responsibility and other interests (including work)? I suppose it depends on how much time those interests take. Even when I worked part-time, with the traffic I was absent from home for full 8 hours in a day - the best, most productive morning and daytime hours. Very time-consuming, if I may humbly say so.
Can the workforce benefit from our abilities? Sure. But who needs us more? And what is our most important responsibility? No, it's not like we should literally never set foot outside the home. You won't hear me say "having a career is wrong because having a career is wrong, period". But before we commit to anything, be it work, community projects or anything you can think of, we should ask ourselves two questions – does it bring glory to God? And does it lead me away from taking care of my family? I don't have an answer to that. Only you can answer these questions for yourself, through thought and prayer.
If there is a certain ability you've been blessed with and you're sure you will have to give it up when you take on the duties of wife and mother, you might want to think outside the box and see how this very talent can be used to bless your own family. For example: if I have an eye for interior decoration, I can invest in decorating other people's homes, or put all of my energy into making my own home a lovely place; if I'm a gifted writer, I can travel around the world as a journalist, or I can write wonderful children's books while telling stories to my toddler; and if you want a personal example, I can spend the best part of my day counseling people about their nutrition, or invest in the health and well-being of my own family. Well, you get the idea.
So, in my opinion, the question shouldn't be, 'do we use our talents?', but rather 'how do we use our talents?' We must remember that our time and energy are limited resources and we should manage them wisely. And wisdom will come from reminding ourselves about where our hearts truly belong.