Like every human being, I'm full of imperfections, but if you asked me to name my most serious flaw, I'd say it is impatience. It doesn't take much to make my blood boil and I lose my temper pretty quickly.
And you know what, I've reached a resolution. I decided this is going to change. Most of you probably know that during this period of my life, I need so much patience. I need the ability to wait without whining, to follow without frustration. But it's not something seasonal, of course. I definitely feel improving myself in this area will help me become a better person.
Every day brings trials – from a line at the supermarket to a conversation with someone I don't find agreeable. The temptation is always there – to mumble and grumble, to say I just can't take this anymore, to let my anger overflow and say something nasty. I always feel so bad afterwards.
So I decided that from now on, whenever I feel I'm approaching the point where I'm about to lose control, I will close my eyes, breathe deeply and make myself slow down. And I will ask myself the following questions:
Do I have a good reason to be impatient, angry, frustrated? Probably not. Most likely what makes me annoyed is just a normal, average everyday thing.
Even if I have real trials, it was all determined by God. Why can't I accept it with love and a patient smile?
If I let myself go now, will I regret it in an hour? Probably.
Do you think it is fun to live with someone so impatient? How can you ever become a good wife without cultivating the virtue of patience?
I'm thinking that this period of my life can become a blessing after all. I have so much to learn, so much to work on as I prepare to become a wife.