Sunday, June 10, 2007

Modesty – it changed my life

Emily from "Unfurling Flower" is making a series of posts about modesty, why we should dress modestly and what modesty contributes to our lives. I'm looking forward to reading! I haven't had the opportunity to write too much about this subject so far, but I won't exaggerate if I say it actually changed my life. Some time ago, I wrote an article about it, which you can check out if you want to.

Today, I normally wear ankle-length skirts, and I don't own any shirts with sleeves that leave the elbow uncovered. As a teenager, if someone told me I was going to dress like this, I'd laugh. I wouldn't recognize myself if someone showed me a picture of me as I am today.

I believe modesty is an essential, irreplaceable part of femininity. For me, embracing modesty came together with getting to know and learning to love my feminine role. Changing my tight jeans and sleeveless t-shirts to long and flowing dresses came together with being more gentle, submissive, patient and respectful.

And you won't believe the enormous change I saw in attitude of men towards me. In the period I now refer to as my 'previous life', I noticed greedy, hungry expressions as I walked down the street. Now I see recognition and respect of my chastity. No man ever dared to say anything rude or disrespectful ever since I changed my standard of dress.

But it's not only about how others see us, of course, like Emily so wisely points out. Be sure to check out her blog!


Mrs. Brigham said...

I could have written this post! When I was on the very beginning of my "coming to back to God journey", I read Wendy Shalit's book on modesty and then began to change my dress style into something much more modest and feminine than it had been prior. I could hardly believe how such a simple change could impact my life in large ways.

Emily's series sounds very exciting!

Anna S said...

I have read Wendy Shalit's book too. For a long time, I couldn't get past the first chapter because I would get so emotional, telling myself, "I want this too, I want to get back there! But how do I do that?!" :) It really had a huge impact on me!

Mrs. U said...

Anna, I would love to hear more about your shirt sleeves covering your elbows. I have never thought about it before. Would you mind sharing specifically about that conviction?

Mrs. U

Anna S said...

Mrs. U,

As someone who in the past has failed so miserably in this particular area, I feel I must be especially strict. Of course, this is just a personal conviction, not something I think everyone are supposed to follow.

Ways of Zion said...

I found the same. In fact in "my previous life" it was a close male friend that pointed out that in dressing immodestly I was obviously attracting the oppsite kind of mate that I wanted. Made the switch, realized how right he was, found the man G-d matched me with.

Anna S said...

Ways of Zion,

I believe so many women could be so much better off if we revive the lost virtue of modesty!

Lean Not said...

Like Mrs. U, I also was curious about the sleeve issue.

I really admire you for changing so strongly! I have a great deal of respect for someone who changes her actions entirely to match up with her convictions -- getting as far over onto the right side as possible, instead of hugging the line and going beyond the standard like so many do.

Melian said...

Anna, you are such an encouragement to me! I was often singled out for my more modest attire in school, and I wasn't as conservative in my dress as I am now. I am slowly moving toward an "almost all" dresses and skirts closet. I think I will still hang onto a few pairs of pants, but I do like skirts better. I walk, talk, act and think differently in skirts. In pants, I can be careless about how I carry myself and fool myself into believing that my behavior is modest because I'm not showing skin. In skirts, I think twice before I move. As someone who is prone to immodest behavior (not sexually provocative, but overly loud, boisterous and unladylike), I find the reminder of a skirt to be supremely helpful.

Anna S said...


The sleeve issue is exactly what you mentioned - not even being close to the line of what I find acceptable.


As someone who used to be pants-only, and is now skirts-only, I have to agree with you! It does feel so different! I feel so comfortable and feminine in skirts these days, and I have found out that there's practically no job that can't be done in a skirt. For housework, I wear a denim skirt and it's just as comfortable as a pair of jeans.

Mrs. Brigham said...

Have you ever read Wendy's blog? She started Modestly Yours and has several other ladies who also blog there with her. It is well worth the read. She also recently published a new book called "Girls Gone Mild" that is very good.

Anna S said...

Mrs. Brigham,

Yes, I have read Wendy's blog and I love it!

Mrs. U said...

Thank you for explaining your conviction. I had just never thought about sleeves before. No wait... I take that back. I HAVE thought about sleeves because, for me, anything "sleeveless" is inappropriate.

You know, it's so nice "knowing" everyone online that is very modest. Even in my church (and I'm married to the pastor!!!), I am questioned constantly as to why I always wear a dress or a skirt. It's nice to simply fit in. :)

Mrs. U

Anna S said...

Mrs. U,

Indeed, it is very nice to fit in for a change :) I sometimes even have to face open hostility about my decisions regarding modesty, and other convictions. Even though I've never tried to tell others how I think they should dress...

Emily said...

Thanks for recommending my series Anna :) I have only been starting to implimenting modesty dress in my life since the beginning of this year, but already it has made a massive difference, as you say. Thank you for being such a great example and sticking to your commitments. Keep it up!

Lauren Christine said...

I also feel like I could have written that post! Praise God for His patience in teaching us about how we should act and dress. Thanks for the encouragement!

Anna S said...

Lauren Christine,

I'm sure many, many women all around the world who made the decision to reclaim modesty and incorporate it in their lives, can tell what an enormous impact it had.