Every unmarried woman is probably familiar with the following sayings:
'Find contentedness right where you are';
'Bloom where you are planted';
'Everything in His timing, according to His plan';
'Make good use of your years as a single';
I agree with all of the above! We should find happiness and be content in our single years; some will get married at 18 and be happy; some will get married at 35 and be happy. A few of us will never get married at all. Whatever plan is reserved for you – and you can never really know for sure before you're married - your life doesn't start at the moment you become a Mrs. Our time is too precious to be spent pining away for a husband and feeling inferior because we're still single at 25 (or 30, or 35…).
Our years as single women should be a productive time, a season during which we perfect our homemaking skills and prepare for our future role as wives and mothers (the majority of us will have families, someday). It is also a time when we can be more active in our community and participate in projects we might be too busy for when we finally embark on the journey of married life.
Now I'm about to say something that might sound a bit controversial: I think we shouldn't become too busy as singles, either. We might have our hands so full with the many activities we committed to, and have our next few years planned out so carefully, that we actually can't make room for the right man if he comes along unexpectedly! Notice that I'm not saying 'the first man who comes along'. But if you meet a decent man and say, 'I'd marry him after college' or 'after I'm done with this and that…' - well, I think it's quite risky: what if the opportunities you have later won't be as numerous as you thought? Here's what I think: if you're serious about marriage, keep focus and make room for marriage in your life!
Another thing we should be cautious about, I think, is being too perfectly happy as singles. How does that work with finding contentedness in each season of our lives? I think the message we should be sending isn't 'I'm quite happy as I am right now, thank you very much, and I don't need anything else', but rather, 'I'm happy, but I feel ready to move on to the next stage, and I'm eagerly anticipating it.'
What I've noticed from conversations with friends is that young women today are actually embarrassed to admit they want to get married! Some have the feministic ideas too deeply ingrained, and some are afraid to sound desperate and discontented if they tell that more than anything, they want to find a decent man and settle down. So they make it seem as though they aren't even interested in meeting men right now – which might just draw their Prince Charming away.
I don't think there's anything wrong in being a bit more active, either. I know many women who met their husbands through networking of friends and relatives: they let others know they are interested in meeting a man with the purpose of courtship and marriage, and were introduced to suitable bachelors. In a gentle, respectful and feminine way, they prayerfully sent off the following message: 'I'm ready to become a wife now; I'm looking for a good man to start a family with.'