Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Questions and Answers - Part 2

... And so we continue yesterday's Q&A:

6. "How do you feel when people force their opinions and expectations onto you? How do you deal with this?"

I used to be very defensive and very sensitive to criticism. Every negative word would make me bang my head against the wall - but in time, I developed thicker skin and got over it. Now, I simply don't respond to people who are pushy enough to force their opinions. I have learned it's a waste of time to hold a discussion with someone who doesn't wish to learn and grow, but only wants to make everyone else stick to their point. So normally I just shake it off and move on.

7. "What would be the most important thing you would teach your children?"

To know and love God, to trust Him and to serve Him joyfully, with an open, honest, tender heart. To have a personal relationship with Him and place Him above all. Nothing in the world can be more precious than that.

8. "What would you most like to see changed/occur in the world within your lifetime?"

I wish more people realized that the crazy life we are living isn't making us happy. That owning many nice things or being popular doesn't bring peace of mind. I wish more people took the time to be with their families, their friends, and above all, God; to reflect and meditate on life, and to live every moment to the fullest; I wish more people saw there are more options than constantly running the rat race to be able to afford items you won't have the time to enjoy. I wish more people who are currently unhappy, stressed out and unfulfilled found their way to a simpler, more peaceful and contented life.

9. "What do you find is the most common misconception regarding you ideologies and how do you think people so often get the wrong impression?"

Oh my, where do I start? I think it's everything that has to do with how I see the woman's role. More specifically: I get questions about whether I believe women are less worthy than men, whether I think women should be uneducated, shouldn't make a difference in the world, should buck up and take it if they are abused... all sorts of crazy nonsense. Where does it come from? I think it's unwillingness to understand, maybe even laziness. It would be enough to take 10-15 minutes and check out my FAQs section to know what I really think on these matters.

10. "What was it like overhauling your lifestyle and how long did it take for you to feel comfortable in your own skin?"

I think this question should be rephrased from past to present. You see, the journey I am on is a constant process of learning and growing closer to God, which - I hope and pray - will not stop until my last breath. But there were certainly important milestones, for example, renouncing the ideas of feminism, making the commitment to modesty, purity and chastity, starting to learn woman's role in the home and the arts of homemaking - all of this didn't happen in one day. I estimate it took about two years until I could say, "I have changed". Around that time it was also noticed and acknowledged by people close to me.

Again – thank you for bringing up all these important points. I feel I could, and maybe should, write a separate essay about each and every one of them – it's a shame time doesn't allow at the moment. I do hope I provided some clarity, though, and if you have any other questions about these topics, or other issues, feel more than free to contact me anytime!


Terry said...

You are right, real change is a process that takes a while. But it's worth it, isn't it? And I like the point you made about the assumption others make concerning your views on women's roles. I'm almost convinced that a great many people, uncomfortable with their own choices, are always on the defensive when confronted with many of the principles you share here.

Elizabeth said...

Another great post, Anna my friend! :->

Adlyn said...

I also have the same problem with modesty. I once saw this girl on television wear very low jeans and exposing her underwear. when I saw this at age 11-12 years I thought it was so "cool" that this girl exposed herself. it was not untill I was 15 years old that I found out that girls like that have no self-esteem and I felt shame because I wanted to be like that girl. well, I on my journey to modesty too. My only problem is that how to I stay mosedest that no longer values modesty? I sometimes get the urge to dress like immodestly. I sometimes I feel envyous of other girls who do wear tight clothing and such and look (by america's standard) "cool" and "attractive", while I'm the (again by america's standard) "unattractive" and "too uptight" and should "let loose" and (GOD forbid) "expiriment" (whatever THAT means). how do you keep the urge to stay modest in a world of immodesty? my body/heart/mind says just immodestly while my religion say dress modestly. I want to dress modestly but it just TOO HARD! HELP!


USAincognito said...

Excellent Part II, Anna! :)

Asia said...

I don't understand why so many people get defensive about women roles. I try to explian to explian to one of my roomates that it is God's order and design not mine. I don't know what else to say to her. (do you know what I can say to her? I even ponited her to some verses but she think that, that verse is old and it doesn't count) I don't want to get in a fight with her about women roles. I don't see how some people think that God's way is only to put women lower then men. Some think that it is to make a women of God to feel less. But I know that is NOT true.


Rebekah S. said...

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this post, Anna!! I would love to read those essays if you write them!! :)

Rebekah S. said...

Oh, Adylyn, what a great question!! :) I can't wait to see what advice Anna has to share. I wanted to let you know, Adlyn, that I'm planning on doing a post on this very subject soon on my own blog, so be sure to be on the outlook for it!! I plan to address the questions you asked on the other post of Anna's Q and As as well. Be on the outlook for those! :) And please feel free to e-mail me anytime.

Stay strong, dear sister!

Rebekah S. said...

Wow, Asia! What an awesome question! :) I, too, am planning on doing a post on this subject on my own blog very soon, so please keep checking back for that-I hope it will be helpful to you! Just really quickly, there is one verse that I want to go ahead and share with you, even before I publish my blog post. And that is: "All Scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for instrucion in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work."(2 Tim. 3:16-17) The words of the Bible may have been written a lot time ago, but they are every bit as relevant and helpful and beautiful today as they were the day they were written down. God's plan and design for the family is so beautiful, loving, and abundantly wise! The family is most productive, the happiest, the most fulfilled, the healthiest, and the most influential for the kingdom of God, when they follow His wonderful plan and His loving commands.


Karen said...

*Sigh* Sadly in this day and age too many people think that if you're not all for taking a man's role and devoting yourself to your career, you must think women should be subservient little ragdolls or something. It's really tragic that they even have this ridiculous notion, because from all my extensive reading of old literature, I really don't see it ever happened in the first place. I think they are getting it from Hollywood!!

Anonymous said...

Again, another good Q&A, Anna. I know I can see myself in some of your answers!

And if I could address Adlyn here: sweetie, please don't be too hard on yourself if modest dressing doesn't come all at once. You must be patient. Observe other women who do it well & gracefully, & when you find your style (and you're confident that God is pleased with your choices), stand your ground in the face of others who would try to sway you. Good luck, & God bless!


Mrs W said...

Adlyn, it can be difficult, especially if you are in a church that doesn't value modesty either. I know it probably sounds like something you may have heard before, but it's important that you do what God wants YOU to do in this area. Sometimes I still have the temptation to dress immodestly, and the Lord is able to help us with that. I used to dress very immodestly before the Lord changed me. Now when I go out and I'm wearing a long skirt and a shirt that covers me (I know the fashion for pregnant women is to wear a shirt that leaves their belly exposed, but not me) I wear it knowing that I am representing God to the world. That is how I think of it. I need to be beautiful and modest because I represent God, and this might be the only taste some people ever get. I know some people who are dear friends of mine today, and we met for the first time in Walmart. They were dressed very modestly, and I was too, and I approached them and asked them if they knew Jesus. The King's daughters recognized each other because they were dressed like they were the King's daughters. I hope that this helps.

deb said...

I came from a very unstable homelife. My journey to and with God has been a long one. SOmetimes the change that I knew God wanted me to make in my life, I fought and fought against. The whole process has given me sympathy toward people who are just beginning to find faith. So, I can relate to Anna's last answer about the length of time that it took her to change.

Rebekah S. said...

Thank you so much for that, Mrs. W.! That was helpful to me as well, and I couldn't agree more.

Kristi said...

On thought that comes to mind is from Proverbs 31:10. It says, "Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price (worth) is far above rubies."

Modest dress is a reflection of what is in our hearts. It begins inside. It's not just a matter of not showing off our bodies; it's showing to the world that we believe God's word. He says virtue and modesty, a meek and quiet spirit, are of great value to Him. The devil, our own flesh, and the world constantly lie to us and try to pull us down, but fight the good fight and seek the Lord with all your heart. He will not forsake you. He will give you what you need. I'll be praying for you.