Thursday, February 18, 2010

Student debt gone to extreme

Here is an interesting article about a case of student debt gone to extreme. It talks about a woman who, due to poor financial management, will probably live with her student debt for the rest of her life. The debt is ruining her life and preventing her from starting a family.

Most students who take loans to pursue their education manage to pay off their debt eventually, but it can still be a heavy burden for years, and it's not always worth it, especially if the person in question is a woman who eventually decides she wants to stay at home with her family, on a permanent basis or at least while her children are young. I can't count the times when I've had readers tell me (through comments or emails) that they are only working to pay off their student debt, so that they can stay home with their children. The early years in marriage often take some financial adjustment anyway (new responsibilities, purchasing a house, having a first child). Starting family life with the additional burden of debt must be very stressful.

I believe that the need for higher education for any and everyone must be re-evaluated in the first place. Universities, and here in Israel especially private colleges, have become places that gobble up our money, often without the students' effort paying off in the future. In some professions, it's very difficult to find employment. Others don't pay off nearly as well as you'd think, considering how much effort people put into acquiring their degree.

In some fields, like nutrition, young professionals (around here) are paid very little in their first years of work, until they have enough authority to build a private clientele, and the prestigious work in hospitals, which helps to keep up a professional profile, is always low-paid. One can often get more in unprofessional jobs. When I see how my friends from university are doing in that regard, I think to myself that when they are no longer single, they will need to re-evaluate. Either they will postpone having children (for how long, I don't know, nature does have its limits), or they will stay home with them – or they will work nearly for free, daycare costs deduced.

Ideally, I think a person should save up for education in advance. It makes more sense to me to postpone higher education for a year or two, work and save up, than to take a loan and dive in, and later have that loan hanging over your head for years. If parents can help out that's wonderful, but I don't think they should feel obligated to do so, and if they do help, I think they are within their rights to question whether that particular education path they are paying for is indeed a sensible choice for their child.

During my years in university, I lived at home, went to and from campus by bus, worked part-time in private tutoring and translating, and in general lived very frugally. I don't have and never had a credit card. I finished my education with no debt, which was wonderful because, although there was no way I could anticipate it, I got married very soon after graduation. My husband was always very financially responsible as well, so we were off to a good start.

 I'm not saying a student loan should never be an option. Sometimes, when it's fairly certain the professional degree will be a great economical boost, it would make sense to take a modest loan rather than to work for more years in unprofessional low-paying jobs. But overall I believe we should all strive to be debt-free.

We opted not to take a mortgage, but instead to buy a house in an area where housing is cheaper, and where our savings were nearly enough to cover the house. You can imagine how glad we are about that now. Yes, there are still bills to be paid, but at least we're not slaves to mortgage. Mortgages are so common here that having one isn't considered being in debt at all, but it is debt, and one that will often keep a family tied in a knot for 20 or 30 years. People live in nice, impressive apartments, but they haven't really paid for them yet, and if the main bread-winner is laid off, the situation can become very complicated indeed.

Debt will weigh you down. Living with past debts will often prevent you from doing what is good for your family now, such as having the wife and mother stay home. If you are out of debt, good for you – stay out of it. If you are in debt, work carefully towards eliminating it. 


Anonymous said...

This is so true, I am one that can testify that taking a student loan no matter how modest or for how short a time can be a drain both emotionally and financially.

You are very fortunate indeed to be in a debt free, mortgage free position at this stage of your lives and I am glad for you that your aim is to stay that way.

Our aim is to become debt free shortly however to do this we will be selling our current, too small home which my grandmother owns 50% of and I have a mortgage on the rest, we will then be renting a slightly larger home (one with at least one bedroom - two if we can afford it). Unfortunately in the area that we live and indeed most of the country rental prices are so high that a single income family wont be able to save much towards buying a home and even then, around here the smallest properties (like mine) cost what I would have earned before taxes, tithes, bills or anything were deducted from my salary in more than 5 years. In other words we will never be able to afford a home of our own without a mortgage, instead we will be paying off someone elses mortgage for quite possibly the rest of our lives. However for us this is a better situation than we are in at the moment when we are over crowded and paying "rent" to a family member that then feels obliged to offer financial "advice".

Deborah said...

I agree wholeheartedly with this post! The only thing I would add is that, once you're out of debt, it's a very good idea to save an emergency fund that has enough money to cover your bare-bones expenses for 3-6 months. Then you can have real peace of mind in your financial life!

I was raised in a family that shunned debt, and I made it through college with no debt, thanks to the generous support of my family. However, when I chose to go to graduate school, I took on student loans. I ended up never using the master's degree that I earned--I worked in unrelated fields until I left the workplace so that my husband and I could move overseas for his job. From the day I finished my formal education, my goal was to get out of debt quickly. My husband also had a large amount of debt, but thanks to careful budgeting and self-discipline, we were completely debt free within 2.5 years of marriage. The only thing we ever will consider going back into debt for is a house, and even then only if the loan meets certain criteria (15-year fixed rate mortgage where the monthly payment is no more than 25% of our net monthly income). We're currently saving for a down payment, as well as for our baby-on-the-way and for some other anticipated needs, and we hope to buy outright with no debt when we are finally ready to buy a house. (As long as we're overseas, housing is part of our compensation, so we're not in a hurry to buy right now.) We have great peace of mind knowing that even if the worst happens, we have no debt, we have an emergency fund saved up, and if it gets really bad, we have our house fund and other savings as well.

Thanks for advocating good common sense and for being such an encourager!

Melanie said...

This is so true. One of my largest regrets is that I didn't keep my student loan debt down. When I married a year ago I carried about $25,000 in student loans with me (he had about $2,000). Fortunately he does not hold this against me, but we know we can't start having children until it's gone because we can't eliminate it on a single income. All this for an education that will be of little value to me as a stay-at-home mother (or even as a professional- a library science Master's won't even earn you that much in the field unless you get a second Master's and become a subject specialist at a college or university). Thank heavens we're both in agreement about living frugally and getting the debt gone so we can start our family next year. More than half the loans are paid and we've still been able to purchase a small house with a mortgage he can afford on his salary once I'm no longer working. He's also an incredible saver, so we're building a fund for emergencies, and several others for recurring large expenses (such as insurance) besides. I've heard of parents who offer their children $10,000 at the end of college for graduating debt-free, to start their lives with. This sounds like a brilliant idea to me, and much cheaper than taking on loans for my children someday ;) This may or may not be possible, however, based on how many children we're blessed with!

Laura Ashley said...

There is so much truth in what you said. I just think how long it is taking me to pay off $3,000. I can't imagine people that have to pay off $50,000 or more.

One problem with people working before college is that, instead of saving, they just make more bills. They get things like a car or credit cards, so when they finally start college they have to keep working to support themselves. I've seen that a lot in people that join the military after high school. They come out in no position to go to study full-time, even with money to pay the tuition from the GI Bill. Rather than living frugally for a few years and saving, people just make bills.

There are options in the US that I know of. For one, you can do your first 2 years at a community college. If you do well, there are scholarships and grants out there for you to continue. If all you want is vocational training (such as cook, carpentry, truck driver, secretary, nurse's aid, brick layer, welder etc..) then you should look into Job Corps, it is totally FREE. They cover all expenses. There is no reason to fork over thousands of dollars to train at a vocational school for something that is free.

Debt really is a curse when your in over your head. And student loans are the worse, because, unlike a house that can be forclosed or car that can be repossessed, you can't give it back to the bank.

I urge people to plan their educations carefully.

CappuccinoLife said...

This is really sad, and it's scary how debt can increase quickly. Dh and I have often noted on our credit card statements that the minimum payment is something like $15. Even with a small debt, if you're running up $1000 credit monthly, and only paying the minimum of $15, you will be in debt bondage for the rest of you life. :(

I'm glad the woman featured in the article at least admitted to her part, not making payments etc. When the economy crashed here, everybody was trying to figure out why, but what i heard over and over again was people admitting to knowingly taking on more than they could pay, or even lying about income and assets (at debt broker's suggestion) in order to get a bigger loan. One woman talked about how a mortgage broker had "helped" her get a 240,000 loan for a house when her yearly income was around 25,000. Yet everybody wanted to put the entire blame on the lending institutions. They're certainly opportunistic leeches on society, but who was giving them the opportunities? The public.

I must say, though, a doctor has a better chance of paying off debt than most, especially if she avoids "doctoritis" (the need for status symbols and buying things according to her income). It will still take years, but she can do it if she's willing to live extremely frugally.

Mrs. Anna T said...

Laura, of course people who work before college should do that with their future in mind - live frugally and save as much as they can. Working won't help if you spend all you earn.

Pendragon said...

Thank you for not framing this post as universal advice. I agree with you that taking out student loans is a very serious burden, but it can be a good choice depending on what your goals are.

I will say that the doctor profiled in the story is far from a representative case (and the article you linked pointed this out). She erred quite seriously in failing to understand what she was getting into, and in failing to communicate with the loan company. My experience has been that keeping up with student loan obligations is easy, as long as you COMMUNICATE with the loan company when you are having problems. You cannot just skip payments without explanation.

In my case, I was extremely fortunate that my parents paid for private secondary school and for college. But they told me I was on my own for law school. They also talked to me about the fact that incurring a large law school debt could very well mean postponing home ownership and baby-making. So I made my choices with full-knowledge of the consequences, but the trade-off made sense to me in the long run.

My husband and I started our marriage with about $250,000 in law school debt between us. We chose to work in relatively low-paying public sector/public interest jobs that we loved for many years, but we still always managed to make our loan payments. The only real mistake we made was incurring about $10,000 in credit card debt when we were first starting out. THAT did put a huge dent in our lifestyle, but with several years of frugal living we paid all the credit card debt off. I look back very fondly on that time, and I feel that the team work we needed to accomplish our goal made our marriage stronger.

My move to private sector employment made our monthly loan payments seem very easy to make. We also became home-owners by our mid-30s, something that I had not anticipated so young, though of course this means adding a mortgage payment to our monthly expenses. Now, at close to 40, we are contemplating parenthood, by either pregnancy or adoption. We still feel young so the trade-offs of large student loan debt do not feel as drastic as we anticipated when we started law school.

That said, we certainly will be in debt until we are 65. This does not feel like a big deal to me at all. We have a very comfortable standard of living, perhaps more comfortable than if we had not gone to law school. Neither of us can quit our jobs, but the whole point of getting a law degree is that we wanted to work in this field.

So it is not for everyone, but in our case, our large debt was necessary to allow us to live the life of our dreams. My goal is this: At age 65, I want to be debt-free and mortgage free, own my house outright, have a happy healthy child in his or her 20s, have a lifetime of achievement and contribution to the legal field to look back on, and plenty of years ahead of me to continue working, write a book, volunteer, travel, or whatever we choose. None of this would have been possible for us without that $250,000 loan! Som while it isn't always fun or easy, I will continue paying that monthly obligation gladly.

Mrs. Anna T said...

Lillian, in our area, many young families live in caravans. I don't know whether it's possible where you live, but the rent is extremely cheap, and it's a temporary solution that allows a family to save for a real home.

Mrs. Anna T said...

Pendragon, loans can provide a solution for many families who are working towards a goal, and not simply seeking to live above their means, but what personally puts me off is the uncertainty debt brings.

So many things can happen. For example, people take mortgages based on a certain income they must bring every month, and they might be laid off for an extended period of time. Or people might fall ill, or, at some point of their lives aim for a more family friendly lifestyle.

In particular, there's a trend of women who heaped student loans upon themselves, only to discover a few years down the road that all they really want is to be wives and mothers, yet now they must keep working until they pay off their loan. Men, too, might discover that what they really want is a less demanding profession that will allow them to spend time with their families, but must keep going to pay off student loans/mortgage/car loans/credit card debt, etc.

To sum it up, I feel that being in debt is taking away some of our freedom. Should you, for example, want to retire if you have a child, it might be a problem, not because you couldn't make it on one income, but because of debt. I sincerely hope, of course, that you and your family will successfully pay off all your debt in time, I'm just saying people should think twice before signing up for a loan or a mortgage.

Lea said...

I'm currently finishing up (Lord willing!) a PhD. I have never had any debt during college thanks to working at least part time, tuition wavers that comes with assistantships, and generous family members (undergrad only!). Yes, it can be done! Is it not always fun? Yes. But SOOOOO worth it! (We've also never had to borrow money for anything since then but the mortgage we hold on our house.)

My husband had about $15,000(US) in school debt since his final program was a 10 hour/day 50 wk in one year program that would not have allowed him to work without sacrificing too much sleep. We paid it off in about 2 years, and it wasn't always easy. We are very, very fortunate!

As University faculty the guidelines we are given for recommendation to students of the total amount of loans over 4 years is no more than the first year's salary in their field. This assumes that they will work for 4 years in that field and pay off the loans during that time. For most student's that is approximately $5000(US)/year. Roughly enough to cover tuition only. Most people don't heed this advice!

Thanks for writing this Anna - it pays to have people think ahead and get through with as little debt as possible! No matter what they plan to do after graduation.


Catherine R. said...

Anna, I read an article not long ago about a young woman who was so desperate to pay off her student loans, that after graduation she took to prostitution.

I can relate to that feeling of desperation. Heavy debt creates a feeling of inner panic, which is not exactly compatible with the feelings of empowerment one is supposed to have upon obtaining a college degree.

I have a lot of student debt, but I decided to stay home with my little one anyway, despite the fact that we have no way to pay. My thinking changed radically at the end of college and at that time I wished I had never gone but it was too late. Now my husband I are looking to make the best of a bad situation and me going to work and dropping my little one at a daycare does not seem like a good choice, however, I hope to warn others that college should not be viewed as something mandatory to be persued at all costs; something was brainwashed to believe. I was scammed.

Mrs. Anna T said...

I can't even imagine what it would be like for me and my husband now to be dealing with unemployment AND a huge mortgage/lots of debt. It would have made any financial struggles ten times as stressful.

Kate said...

Off topic, but I see in your wishlist you have Nourishing Traditions and Back to Basics. You can try to find them at a discount on, and Also, I'll keep my eyes out when I visit used bookstores and garage sales here in the States. I know you may be able to afford the book, but shipping would be crazy. My parents' neighbors are Jewish and have adult children living in Israel.

Gothelittle Rose said...

Mortgages can be scary and tough.. depending on where you are. In my area, my mortgage payment is less than it would cost to rent a house or apartment that would hold all of us. So selling the house in times of financial trouble is not an option unless we want to be homeless, because we couldn't afford any of the alternatives.

Plus, houses cost so much...

It's not like we bought a mansion. Our home cost us less than the median price in our area. I wouldn't favor going into debt for a house that cost, say, $30,000. When the smaller, cheaper homes cost over $200,000, however...

Walters Inc said...

Student Debt is a troublesome thing. As students in America we are almost led to believe that some-how you will be in a better financial position to pay off what you owe in five years. That is seldom the case. My dear husband graduated Bible College with $16,000 in Student Loans. We worked together to pay it down till in March of 09 I was able through God's grace to become a stay-at-home mother to our children (One who is 19 mts and one who will be hopefully born in 1 month)
My husband has a little less then $8,000 to go and we are in the clear. It has been such a character builder and lesson to us both. We encourage young couples, students, and also will our own Children to stay out of the student loan trap.
Sorry this is so long Anna!

Anonymous said...

Anna, you mention in an earlier comment about living in caravans, known here in the US as mobile homes. Generally you buy a mobile home and rent the land it stands on in a mobile home park (people who know better, correct me if I'm wrong!). In the long run, it's not necessarily the best economically. Of course it depends where you live in the country. Also, some mobile home parks do not have the best elements of society living there. I may sound prejudiced, again, it depends on the area you are living in if that is an option you want to take when you are raising a family.

Mrs. Anna T said...

Anon, around here, people normally don't buy caravans, but only rent them, and the rent is VERY cheap (about, I think, 25% of the average rent).

Jo said...

In Australia students can chose to pay for each subject up front or wait until they are earning before they pay their debt. We decided to pay for our son's course in 3D animation, it was very expensive but now he is debt free and out of the way and can be forgotten.

As for a mortgage - we simply couldn't save the amount needed to buy a house outright so a mortgage is only way to go. Ours is quite small compared to most as we bought during a financial down-turn in the early 2000's and the person we bought from was very eager to sell. But it must be very hard for young couples wanting to buy a house and settle down. We pay slightly more each fortnight so we are always in front - it makes me feel more comfortable.

Anonymous said...

I agree that heavy student debt can be damaging to later prospects. But when the choice is "heavy debt or very poor prospects", no wonder people choose debt as the lesser of two evils. My own preferred solution is that as equal access to further and higher education is a hallmark of a fair society, said education should be funded - both fees and reasonable living expenses - by the state through the taxation system. I would gladly pay more tax to support educational opportunities in this way.


Gothelittle Rose said...

Not sure how it is in the UK (I'm guessing that the name "Nineveh_uk" means a tagname of Nineveh who lives in the UK?) but in the US we have Community Colleges and State Universities.

A four-year education at MIT or Smith would have, at the time, cost me a total of nearly $200,000 for tuition/fees/room/board alone. Since I got my Associate's Degree at a community-technical college and my Bachelor's Degree at a state university, my education cost me a grand total of $12,000. A Federal income-based Pell Grant covered roughly $7,000 of it... I worked part-time during the year and full-time during the summer and graduated with $1,000 in debt.

Paid it off the first year.

jiabaoyu said...

Ok, I'm a medical student in the U.S like this girl and all I can say is if you want a story about why student loans are bad, medical school loans are probably not the best example because MD's in the US are still, on average, a profitable degree. And unlike most "female" professions, plenty of female docs can drop off and reenter medicine and still make good money. Aside from the training aspect, I think medicine is a very good career for women.

This girl in the article made some bad decisions (as stated in the article) that ballooned her debt. However, that shouldn't be a reason to not incur debt. It's a call for responsible financial management! Your reasoning is like saying that we shouldn't own cars because some people don't take care of their cars and they break down.

This girl's problems isn't b/c she went to med school, it's because she was irresponsible (and dumb). Med schools cost a lot of money in the U.S. I attend the cheapest option for myself and it cost me $30k/year. I live at home. By the time I graduate, I will incur $100k in debt. That can't be helped if I want to be a doctor.

Also, I'd like to point out that the US gov't offers complete tuition reimbursement for primary care doctors (such as the girl in the article) if she decides to work in an underserved area for a set number of years.

My friends who are interested in this say that they have to work as either pediatricians, family medicine doc, internal medicine doc or OB-GYNs for four years in a "poor" area, aka an big city hospital or a rural practice, and their debt is paid off by the gov't.

The girl in the article could have seen a big chunk of her debt erased if she had a better hold of her financial situation.

For most people in our school, if people decide to enter the relative less lucrative profession of primary care, they know they can get tuition waived. For those that enter more lucrative specialties, even a quarter million dollar debt is pretty payable. I've known doctors who live frugally after they start making money and they pay off their debt within five years, after which they begin accumulating a great deal more money for future investments.

Not to say that people should choose a career base solely on money, but as far as paying back student loans, medical students have, by gov't statistics, the lowest default rate of any profession.

The better example would be an English major who attends a top notch expensive school then have to pay back $100k on a $30 salary.

To compare, the average med student at my school comes out with $180k in debt, but the average physician salary is about $200k (with gov't repayment programs for lower paying specialties as prev stated).

If anything, the skyrocketing debt issue would indicate to people that medicine is probably the better investment when choosing a profession.

Marianne said...

I apologize if anyone has said this already, but here's the problem with this young woman's loans (and I don't know how student loans, if even available, work elsewhere) ... in the US, we have the federal loans that are controlled by the government. You can only borrow so much, and the interest charged can only be so high. As a consequence, you can't file bankruptcy on these student loans. Conversely, the private student loans are personal loans. You can borrow an obscene amount of money (like the money it costs to go to medical school) and the loan companies or banks can charge you whatever interest they want. Yet still, you cannot file bankruptcy on these loans. The loan companies or banks get their cake and eat it too. It's predatory and pretty unfair.

I'm one of the people of whom you speak, Ms. Anna. I was foolish and took out way too much money in student loan debt (nothing like this woman) and it's adversely impacted my family (e.g. making it impossible for me to stay at home with my son, etc.). We live very frugally, so that we might be able to pay off my loans. But, at 24, when I took out my last loan, I didn't realize my PhD was not going to be that valuable.

A couple other things ... in the US, college tuitions have gone up more than twice the rate of inflation. Tuiton was already expensive. For many people, going to college is not possible without taking out loans. And most jobs are not attainable without a college education.

It's easy for us all to judge. I pray for her and for other people like myself, for whom this debt was an honest mistake that they'll be paying their entire lives.

Goldnrod said...

My dh had a vision of being debt free. It was tough for a few yrs, but now we are reaping the benefits. He feels so strongly about being debt free that we have our son in a distance learning program for college. It is going to cost a fraction of the traditional college cost, & ds will have a BS in Business in 2 yrs & 1 summer. The program he is in is called Verity. I've also heard good things about CollegePlus. These are both Christian programs, but I'm sure there are others.

Melissa D said...

What makes me want to pull my hair out when reading this article is the repeated phrase "didn't read the fine print"... The whole principle of borrowing money can be summed up as "you are required to pay this back, and then some, and if you skip a payment, it gets infinitely worse." I'm joking (sort of), but is common financial sense so lacking? Is the main woman's issue more about avoiding reality than taking out a loan for education?

I very much agree with you that education loans can be debilitating even at much smaller amounts, but the woman's issues seem to be more about avoiding reality, NOT some arcane fine print that happened to trip her (and the other loan-takers) up, as the article seems to suggest.

I find it most tragic that the parents of many of these people are also paying for their children's mistakes.

Anonymous said...


Pendragon said...

Mrs. T,

I don't think we are in too much disagreement on this, despite our very different life choices.

Yes, debt like mine limits one's freedom to change one's mind. It is important to know what you want out of life before taking on that kind of obligation! I can't imagine signing up for a $125,000 loan without some certainty that that is what I want.

Rebecca said...

Dear Anna,

I am as always amazed how a young woman like you can be so wise. I am 35 ys old but I do not come close to your wisdom.

I am currently in the situation where i have to pay hard and painful for all the bad decisions that I have made in my life and I want to take this opportunity to WARN especially young women who hopefully read this blog.

First of all, FEMINISM IS A TRAP OF THE DEVIL. It leads to women postponing marriage, it leads to women wasting their time with men who don't want to commit, it leads to women postponing childbearing until their fertile years are over, and it leads to divorce (as recently happened in my circle of friends: both spouses have studied law, both wanted successful careers and they could not find an agreement where to live because of their careers. Nobody wanted to make sacrifices for the marriage. I asked my girlfriend why she does not want to submit to her husband, who earns A LOT. Her answer was that she spent so much time and energy to get her degree, that she believes she has the right to work in that field. There was also competition between her and her husband since she has the better degree but earns less than him. Unfortunately the wellbeing of her 2 little sons could not change her decision).

I am a Christian for 10 ys now. I have not been educated in a Christian home and all my life I have been taught the importance of going to university. Nobody taught me the importance of being a wife and mother. This was seen as something that comes naturally and does not need to be encouraged. Well, it does NOT COME NATURALLY!

During my twenties I was so busy with my studies, with working part-time, with partying and useless short-time boyfriends that I did not think of the necessity to seriously prepare myself for marriage.

Then I fell ill for 5 years and still have not recovered fully. I firmly believe this illness (an autoimmune dysfunction) is the result of a break up that hurt me immesurably. I don't have good relationships with my parents, in fact for years I have no contact with them at all. When this guy, whom I was deeply in love with, left me, my world shattered into one million peaces. Short time after this incident i fell seriously ill. I am convinced this is the result of the psychological distress I experienced.

For many years I was hardly able to look after myself. As i said i have not fully recovered from this. This is what relationships with no commitment to get married can do to you! As a result of the breakup and due to the illness which affected my metabolism i experienced extreme weight gain. I weigh now around 270 pounds = 121 kg. I am struggling to lose this weight, but it is such a hard battle!

I despereately want to get married and have my own family, but men don't like obese women and even if i found a guy, I am still ill from time to time, and don't function 100 %. I need a lot of rest and can get exhausted quickly. I suffer from high blood pressure, too. This is all extremely sad.

Rebecca said...

My wonderful degree did not pay off at all. Instead i am earning less than many people who never saw a university from the inside. There are simply no or only extremely low paid jobs for people with a diploma in "paedagogics/educational science". No career advisor from uni or job centre ever told us about this fact. They created an illusion that we would find satisfying and fullfilling jobs with this degree. What a lie!

Women feel often drawn to degrees that deal with social issues, I think this is because of the way God made us!!! I could have never studied economy or engineering. These fields, though more lucrative later on, would have simply bored me to death. And medicine would not have been an option, too, since i am too sensitive, I can't see blood or cut someone open.

I am also left with a student loan. I have to pay back EUR 105 / USD 144 every month. My monthly net salary is only at USD 2,133.

So here I am: ill, overweight, low paid, unmarried and childless.

I blame feminism to have influenced my decisionmaking in a bad way by creating illusions. This is clearly the handwriting of the devil: He is an illusionist and at the time i was an atheist and defenseless.

I pray that a lot of young women read Annas and similar blogs before it is too late for them. I wish someone had told me the truth when I was young.