Monday, May 3, 2010

For every thing there is a season

I was inspired by this post, written by Bethany, to write some more on the subject of working from home and developing our talents from home. As someone who has worked from home in the past, for periods of more or less intensity, I have learned that while working from home is certainly more flexible and family friendly than rushing to an outside job for an entire day, it's still work. It can still be time-consuming, and gobble up much of your energy and resources.

If it's a question of a mother absolutely needing a source of income, and she finds it through a home business, that's wonderful. But if starting a home business is only optional, I believe it should be very carefully considered whether it really is necessary, and how much it will detract from home life, before plunging into it.

I talk specifically about home businesses and working from home here, but to be truthful, the same consideration can be applied to anything that might take up much of the wife and mother's time and energy – such as volunteering, driving the children to and from different activities on a daily basis, even visiting with friends. It's all a question of the time spent on that activity, and whether this amount of time, at this particular season of that family's life, can be spared without putting at risk vitally important things such as peace of mind, relationships, and simply taking the time to enjoy life to the fullest.

Bethany touched on the subject of writing – as someone who has been passionate about writing for most of my conscious life, I can certainly relate to that. Writing can become almost all-consuming for me when I'm in a swirl of inspiration. I have a few short works I've completed not that long ago, and some more on the back burner. Some things I need to translate into Hebrew. I would love to publish someday, perhaps, but currently I'm working in turtle mode, snatching short periods of time here and there – barely counts as keeping up. And I've come to terms with that – the life of a mother is simply very busy, full of things that come around but once and deserve to be savored to the fullest. God willing, time will come when I'm more at leisure, and for now, I'll just enjoy my full life in a young and growing family.

Also, since the beginning of this pregnancy, I have been feeling more and more strongly an effect I have already experienced while I was carrying Shira – being ensconced, drawn within, focused on my nest and on those closest to me. A desire to read, see and listen to lovely things – only lovely, peaceful, calming things. Last time I was about to have a baby, we had a war going on in Israel, and I could hardly bring myself to be updated on the news. Sometimes I'm honestly clueless about some things that are going on here.

Same goes for shallow relationships, social gatherings that are mainly gossip, books and websites that don't leave me encouraged and uplifted – everything that is simply a time-gobbler, or even a good and worthwhile thing but simply too much to keep up with for now, I try to cut out. My time and resources aren't infinite – and there are many days when I feel just how limited they are. Our families and homes are our God-given responsibilities. If there is something I want to do but for the time being it isn't realistically possible, so be it. It can wait. Almost any "extra" can wait, but the same cannot be said about precious things such as the babyhood of my children, nurturing important relationships, and the daily work of tending to my home in a way that will influence the minds of my family in a positive way.   

To sum it up, I'm in a season of life when I'm cutting out many non-essentials, so that I can better enjoy the truly important things that are left. I don't see it as sacrifice, but rather, as prioritizing. I'm casting away things that would become an undue burden for me right now. I want to stay with what encourages and inspires me on my path as a wife and mother, with what helps me to fulfill this uniquely important role.   


Persuaded said...

"My time and resources aren't infinite – and there are many days when I feel just how limited they are."

OK... here's an odd thing I have discovered: the more I stay at home, the more I realize how much I am needed at home, and the more I feel that I need to focus on home. I know that many women who work outside of the home, feel that they only need X-number of hours each week to get their "home things" taken care of... and yet, I, who have so many more hours to devote to taking care of my home and family, feel that I can never have enough time and energy to do it all in the absolute best way that I could!

I'm not exactly sure why that is....

Sarah Brodsky said...

On the topic of writing--any more updates in the Becky story?

Mrs.Rabe said...

I so agree that there are seasons in our lives. The season of raising children is a particularly demanding time, but also the most rewarding and important!

There will be time later for other things.

Good post!

Mrs. Anna T said...

Diane, I think the thing is, when you work outside the home, some things are just permanently set aside because there's no hope of *ever* doing them - and women settle into a very basic routine, which at least somehow ensures survival. :o) But there's of course much more to do at home, an endless number of things in fact, and the more you are at home, the more you discover!

Mrs. Anna T said...


There are some updates, but alas, they are handwritten and not in English, and I simply can't bring myself to translate right now.

Luci said...

Thank you for this important reminder! I definitely need to start cutting back on shallow relationships and media that aren't edifying or encouraging. Extras can wait... God's priorities can't.


Muriel said...

Reading your blog is one of those lovely, peaceful and calming things for me. After email, facebook and the news I read some blogs that lift me up and encourage me, yours is one of my favorite!

Kittee said...

Currently I work from home. I was fortunate that my work place allowed me to do this after my baby girl was born. Some days it really is a "rob Peter to pay Paul" situation but now that my girl is 4 months old things are a little easier. She's on a more or less set schedule of naps and play and during those times I can do my 9-5 work and my house work. Yes I is exhausting and yes I'd love to just be able to do my "housework" but unfortunately my DH and I fall into that camp of people that have to have two incomes right now to pay our bills. Hopefully sometime in the future that will change. :) Until then I am very thankful I have the opportunity that I have now.

Julie said...

I am having my first baby in a few weeks. I do have five children at home, but we adopted them so this is my first pregnancy. I so relate to the need to draw inward and surround yourself with your family and your nest. I have been so drawn to making my home pretty and inviting.
I gave up most every outside activity because it would draw me away from home.
The funny thing is my personality is the exact opposite. I am very much a social people person. I love being out. But this pregnany is drawing me home. :)