Thursday, October 2, 2014

A message from an Italian bachelor

A few days ago I received the following comment, and though I by no means agree with everything this man writes, I found his thoughts interesting enough to be posted here (in a slightly abridged version).

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"I had always thought of woman as possessing those delicate qualities of mind and soul that made her in these respects far superior to man. I had put her on a lofty pedestal, figuratively speaking, and ranked her in certain important attributes considerably higher than man. I worshiped at the feet of the creature I had raised to this height, and, like every true worshiper, I felt myself unworthy of the object of my worship.


But all this was in the past. Now the soft-voiced gentle woman of my reverent worship has all but vanished. In her place has come the woman who thinks that her chief success in life lies in making herself as much as possible like man--in dress, voice and actions, in sports and achievements of every kind.


The world has experienced many tragedies, but to my mind the greatest tragedy of all is the present economic condition wherein women strive against men, and in many cases actually succeed in usurping their places in the professions and in industry. This growing tendency of women to overshadow the masculine is a sign of a deteriorating civilization.


Woman's determined competition with man in the business world is breaking down some of the best traditions--things which have proved the moving factors in the world's slow but substantial progress.


Practically all the great achievements of man until now have been inspired by his love and devotion to woman. Man has aspired to great things because some woman believed in him, because he wished to command her admiration and respect. For these reasons he has fought for her and risked his life and his all for her time and time again.


Perhaps the male in human society is useless. I am frank to admit that I don't know. If women are beginning to feel this way about it--and there is striking evidence at hand that they do--then we are entering upon the cruelest period of the world's history.


Our civilization will sink to a state like that which is found among the bees, ants and other insects--a state wherein the male is ruthlessly killed off. In this matriarchal empire which will be established the female rules. As the female predominates, the males are at her mercy. The male is considered important only as a factor in the general scheme of the continuity of life.


The tendency of women to push aside man, supplanting the old spirit of cooperation with him in all the affairs of life, is very disappointing to me.


Woman's independence and her cleverness in obtaining what she wants in the business world is breaking down man's spirit of independence. The old fire he once experienced at being able to achieve something that would compel and hold a woman's devotion is turning to ashes.


Women don't seem to want that sort of thing to-day. They appear to want to control and govern. They want man to look up to them, instead of their looking up to him, so.. as a bachelor Italian man, I may understand American men who still avoid marriage and I guess they also believe that Women today become the greatest evil, as such, any good men should avoid marriage like a plague!"

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is indeed sad, but the the reason behind it is sadder. Women have done this because they don't trust men. A man's primary purpose is to protect and provide, instead they destroy our homes and sacrifice our children in their never-ending grasp for more land. They sell us as sex slaves, they abandon us and their children for younger, prettier women, they squander the money they are to use to feed us and their children. Is it any wonder women have turned away from relying on men? We gave them the chance. They blew it. We can not afford to depend on men any longer.

living from glory to glory said...

Hello, This was so sad to read! I hope we will still see what ruins we have brought upon ourselves. We can still be that women tour our own Husbands still.
Thanks, Roxy

Lanita said...

Thankfully there are still women out there who cherish the thought of being a woman and embrace their femininity. Thankfully there are still men out there who are gentlemen and treat a lady like a lady. I can empathize with this man though, I have seen many women playing that part of a man and showing disdain for any act of chivalry.

Rutendo said...

Wow, rather frightening truths i think, but i sadly agree to these observations, and chiefly becasue i have been one such woman. I however see were i have gone wrong and also were man has gone wrong in getting women to the point they are. In all things there are two sides, and i believe the other side is because our man have failed to love us and respect us as equals in mind and spirit we have indeed strove against them to the detriment of society at large. I have also seen that a man who respects his wife and treats her as an equal, (not in a worship on a pedastal way)usually is able to have her support and respect in the right kind of Godly way as a help mate (meet). I am not there quite yet but am learning to balance my disappointment at my husband with how i am responsible in making things better. Change of any negative begins with an individual and i encourage the bachelor not to worship women but give them due respect as capable adults who can indeed do almost anything you can do but still have a great need for you in thier lives.

Anonymous said...

Oh dear- this whole message screams "unresolved Madonna-whore complex".
Anna, I'm glad you're doing ok and you're settling into the new house!

Love
Anna

Elisheva said...

"Woman's independence and her cleverness in obtaining what she wants in the business world is breaking down man's spirit of independence." Why do men get to be independent and women don't? Why would God give men and women equal intelligence and abilities if he only expects one half of his creations to use their gifts?

Also, feminism is not about women wearing men's clothes and pretending to be men. Feminism is about choice. The choice over what to do with one's own body. The choice to speak out about what one believes in. The choice to be educated. The choice to work or stay home. By this definition, you are a feminist too, my friend. Welcome to the club.

Anonymous said...

He is looking for a woman in particular , so he needs to be thinking about where to find a like minded woman. Stop thinking about all the worldly women , of which there are millions, but he doesn't want one of those anyway. I found a like minded man 20 year ago after kissing "toads" who never turned into "princes" for years. 20 years ago the world was MORE belligerent about woman being at work and college bound and etc . I was 35 , it looked hopeless, where have all the real men gone? The other problem he may have is putting any woman way up on a pedestal. We are all human,he needs to not worship a woman, love and care for yes, but it would not be good to feel my husband "worshipped" me. And to realize that some of those brassy career minded women even in the church really would love a chance to be a wife and mother , we just have it reinforced that no man is going to want us unless we are strong sexually experienced financially independent (wo) MEN.I stay home and I had about a dozen career women sadly confessing that what they really wanted was to stay home and raise their families,,,,but those days are over...they said to me,even though I was doing it. .Also my sisters do, and now our nieces do and they are in their 20's. In America. And we are not in some religious"cult " either. When I focused in on what I really wanted in a man and stopped even looking at any man who didn't want exactly what I wanted, I found him.Karen

Anonymous said...

Honestly, this man's comments make me laugh-- in a sad and disheartened way. I am a woman, and I have never wanted to be worshipped or put up on a pedestal as if I am a prize or some lofty, unattainable goal. I am just a person.

I have goals for myself-- some personal, some professional, and it has nothing to do with tearing men down, causing them to be uninspired or lacking in confidence. If a man feels this way, perhaps he is placing unrealistic expectations onto the women (or in this case, lack thereof) in his life. Any time you place tons of expectations onto people instead of G-d, you will be disappointed.

It also kind of makes me wonder if this bachelor knows many women at all. Most women I know are interested in a real, honest, down-to-earth relationship, not in being worshipped or adored from afar. It makes me question whether this bachelor truly respects women and sees us as people. I think he has some kind of lofty, unrealistic ideal for women, and it's a little scary to me. If women don't act just the way that he wants us to, he thinks we are somehow destroying society. I think he needs to seriously check his attitude, and maybe try to make some friends who are women, so he can have regular everyday conversations with us and realize that we aren't evil, power-grabbing people who want to stomp on men and smash them down into the dirt.

Personally, I have worked in a variety of professional positions with both men and women, and I've been able to have very healthy relationships with all of my coworkers-- no competition necessary. In fact, just the opposite-- lots of good times, jokes, team-building, cooperation, etc.!

Honestly, it saddens me that some people think that men and women must constantly be in some kind of unspoken competition, when it doesn't need to be that way at all! It's really sad that some men see opportunities for women as a threat to their masculinity, when in reality, it's no such thing at all. It makes me so grateful to G-d for my intelligent, hardworking husband who isn't threatened at all by strong, smart women and who rejoices when he sees great strides made in equality for the sexes in the workplace. He is a strong man AND a feminist, which probably makes for just about the best kind of guy in the world! He knows his own mind, and is strong in his opinions, personal goals, and personality and is interested a wife who is the same way! In my opinion, that makes for the best kind of marriage-- a marriage of equals.

We are all just people, after all, with interests and goals and passions and families. Everyone should rejoice when the world becomes a place that is more open in opportunities for both men and women. Thanks!

M.W. said...

His comments are so odd.
"As the female predominates, the males are at her mercy. The male is considered important only as a factor in the general scheme of the continuity of life."
Women have been dominated by men and important only for procreation for most of our planets history...were we suppose to like that? Were we suppost to not try and get a better life than that? He speaks as if he is confused as to why we want more than that...yet he is obviously not happy in that position himself.
"This growing tendency of women to overshadow the masculine is a sign of a deteriorating civilization" Does he not think that men overshadowing women also is a bad thing? Perhaps civilization deteriorates anytime one gender is dominated by another?
"They want man to look up to them, instead of their looking up to him" Does he think the world was a better place when women were not allowed to doing things worth looking up to?
I have been a stay home wife and mother for 12 years, I married at 19, I never attended collage, I am not educated, I am a conservative Christian, I am not a feminist in any way, but it seems to me that this man is resentful of human equality.
"Practically all the great achievements of man until now have been inspired by his love and devotion to woman. Man has aspired to great things because some woman believed in him, because he wished to command her admiration and respect. For these reasons he has fought for her and risked his life and his all for her time and time again." Historically men have fought and achieved and went to war to take ownership of a place, or a thing or a women, not to cause a women to come to him willingly. He sound like he wishes to go back to the days when women were property.
Women do not usually look for a dominating controlling man who does not allow her to grow. Do we not seek for men who love us, and perhaps see us as a human different from them, in mind body and spirit, but still equal to them?

maria smith said...

Men and women are meant to compliment each other. There is so much to be said for both parties. Lots of women don't even know how to do a deep cleaning or cook a fabulous dinner. Men also have lost the art of chivalry.